It can another new year and everyone who hopes to be anybody in the individual development world is writing about how to make the most of your new year's resolutions and goal setting in general. I suppose I am no different, other than I really do want to share something that will make a real difference in your lifetime. Too many of us, as talk about resolutions and goal setting, we have a good laugh and joke about how we set goals only to have them broken virtually before they are set. Others, the ones who "really have it together", discuss how they make it about a month before their resolutions and objectives are a thing of the past.
I used to do the same thing. I would have fun and joke about how I would set a goal or make a quality to get up earlier, read and study more, write a lot more, be more productive, lose more weight, eat less, exercise more, love far more, etc ., only to have the resolution fade into a hazy smoke inside my memory. I would laugh it off, until one day, somebody helped me mad, really mad.
I was a salesman for a very large product sales organization and our division president was speaking to us; attempting to motivate us. And what he said really made me mad. This individual told a large group of very young salesmen and saleswomen that when we wanted to know how each of our lives would turn out in the end, to just look into the success of our personal sales performance right then and there. I really looked up for this man; he was a leader I really respected, even loved like my very own father. But I could not have disagreed with him more during the time. Who was he to say that because my performance was under stellar at the time and because my attitude was poor, I was likely to have a similar life? Was my life going to be some kind of cosmic repayment because I was having a bad moment then? I not only disagreed, but I got mad at him.
What I did not understand after that, but have learned deeply in the 30 some years since, had been just how right on he was. I have since reworded his 'prophecy' within a slightly different way, but it conveys the truth just as bluntly. Here it will be: The way we do the little things in life is a reflection of how we perform life in general. So if you want to see how your life is going to turn out, have a hard look at how you live in the smaller more invisible parts of your daily life.
Let's look at it in another way. Get a piece of paper and draw an image of a square with four quadrants inside. That's like taking a look at a window with four square panes inside. Now create in the upper left quadrant with the following statement, "Playing to be able to Win" and write in the upper right quadrant "Playing NOT to Lose". Then in the lower left quadrant, write "Just Playing" and the lower right quadrant write "Not Playing at All".
Right now let's describe what each of these squares or quadrants represent, so that as you read, take an honest, even fearless inventory of your own location among these quadrants. I am going to use the game of football being an allegory, but you can use any game or activity that you greatest relate to as we go over these categories.
Playing to Win : Picture a football game where one team is really actively playing to win. Odds are, their approach to playing the game is shown in the score. It is one of those 'odd' games where the score is usually lopsided and the points are high. You know what I mean, the rating looks more like a basketball score instead of a football score. While you watch the game, you notice that their key strategy is all about placing points on the scoreboard and so their offensive game is very powerful. They may pass the ball a lot and when they are playing the running game, their running backs are aggressively picking up lots of yardage on each play. Their uniforms are muddy and ripped as a reflection of their hard work, determination and grit, no matter the chances and difficulties they are facing. They may look like they have been marching via a war zone. They are so battle torn, you can hardly see the figures on their jerseys. The energy they bring onto the field is that regardless of what happens, they are going to reach their goal.
Playing NOT to Lose rapid These games are played by the really strong defense. They may be so committed to hold the line against the offense that they can create a impenetrable line that no one can get past. Unfortunately, they may or may not have the ability to put many points on the scoreboard because they are always on the protective, yes, there may be the occasional intercepted pass or recovered fumble which they might run across the goal. But the essence of their game would be to stop the offense, or recover the ball, and not get "unnecessary risks" so they can put their offensive team into the video game. Defensive games, even strong ones don't win ballgames; these people just prevent games from being lost. They may be playing just like hard, or even harder than their opponent, their jerseys might be just as muddied and torn as their opponents'', but because their own strategy is defensive, even a mediocre offense can win the overall game if they just score a little more than the defense can stop.
Just Actively playing - These jokers have the best uniforms. They talk a great game. They may even have impressive warm ups and pre-game displays. They prance around on and off the field like the prima donnas they may be. There is always lot's of theatrics in their game and drama within their lives. They are quick with an excuse when things don't proceed right for them and they are quick to take the credit when they possess a fleeting success. In the really tough games their uniforms seldom get dirty or torn, which is a symbolic reflection of how small effort, determination or risk they really don't take. They guffaw off their failures and don't really engage in the game enough to understand the lessons it offers them.
Not Playing at All - These people are not really in the game. They are so adverse to taking risks, or even doing the game of life, they sit in the stands and shout at every call the referee makes because they can clearly observe that "the ref" needs new glasses. They play "Monday early morning quarterback" by analyzing and criticizing every play and shift the players make, as though they are better than the coach, or smarter than the players themselves. They are so bereft of a life that belongs to them, they can only participate by just completely identifying with their team, however without taking any risk of getting in the game themselves, so they color their bodies in the team colors, wear funny colored wigs along with carry on in a frenzied state when "their team" wins in addition to grieve as though they lost a loved one when their team manages to lose.
Now that you understand what the quadrants represent and how they relate to each other, the next phase in this process is to take a hard look at yourself and place your self in the quadrant that best reflects where you think you are in regards to how you show up in the game called life; your life. Are you playing for you to win? Playing not to lose? Just Playing? Or not playing whatsoever? Once you put yourself in the quadrant you believe best reflects your own approach your life, your success, take a hard look at what you do, or even don't do and how that shows up in the making and busting of your New Year's resolutions, your goals and dreams. Write down particularly what effects these behaviors and beliefs have in your life. In case you are honest with yourself, you will begin to see the makings of a personal development strategy that you can put in place this next year, if you are willing to really go to work upon yourself. Just note that all your hopes and dreams depend on an honest assessment associated with what you need to work on in your life to move into the quadrant you really want to play within.
Now for those intrepid souls who really want to improve their life's, achievements and win the game, take this activity to ten of your buddies and ask them to be honest with you as they place you in the percentage they think you are playing in and ask them to be brutally truthful by explaining why they put you there. This exercise will be very exposing and will provide you with insights and potential opportunities to sky-rocket your achievement.
This year is yours - go for it!
Mark Andrew Beach is a Previous Fortune 500 business finance executive specializing in personal, business plus executive leadership training, he teaches how you can become rich for a lifetime, learning the law of money and secret of prosperity by offering one-on-one coaching, seminars, and large group workshops
Happy New Year | Happy New Year 2018 | Wish you Happy New Year | Best Happy New Year 2018 Messages | Happy New Year all | New Year Greetings 2018 | 2018 Happy New Year | Happy New Year To All | Wish You New Year | Happy New Year Cards | Happy New Year 2018 Blogs | Happy New Year 2018 Wallpapers | Happy New Year 2018 News | Happy New Year 2018 Music |
No comments:
Post a Comment